Watching your children grow up and step into independence can be one of life’s greatest joys, but it can also stir up feelings of loss, loneliness, and uncertainty. When the house gets quieter and routines shift, it’s not uncommon for parents to notice an emotional emptiness that feels hard to put into words. This experience is commonly referred to as empty nest syndrome.

Becoming an empty nester can be a big life transition. While some people embrace this new chapter with excitement and freedom, others may experience heartache as they adjust. Both reactions are valid, and many people experience a mixture of both. Exploring what empty nest syndrome is and how it relates to mental health can help you feel more grounded and supported as you move through this change.

What is empty nest syndrome?

Empty nest syndrome describes the emotional shift that can happen when children leave home, whether for college, work, or simply to start their own lives. While not an official mental health diagnosis in the DSM-5, it’s more of a commonly recognized term to describe the emotions parents experience during this stage of parenting.

It’s not uncommon to feel a sense of loss when an identity or role you’ve had for so long changes. For some, parenting shaped daily life for years, from managing school schedules to mealtimes to extracurriculars. When that structure is gone, it can feel disorienting. While not everyone experiences empty nest syndrome, it’s a transition that highlights how closely tied identity, routine, and emotional well-being can be.

Signs of empty nest syndrome

Empty nest syndrome can vary from person to person. Some common signs people may notice include:

  • Loneliness or a deep sense of missing children after they’ve moved out
  • Loss of purpose or identity
  • Sadness or heartache when seeing reminders of your children at home
  • Difficulty adjusting to silence or a quieter household
  • Changes in relationships, such as needing to rediscover your connection with a partner or spouse
  • Feeling restless and unsure how to fill your time

Recognizing these feelings as an adjustment can be helpful. They’re not a sign of weakness; these feelings can be seen as a reflection of how much love and care you’ve poured into your role as a parent.

How to cope with empty nest syndrome

Coping with empty nest syndrome may mean finding ways to acknowledge your feelings while also creating space for new opportunities. Some supportive strategies for dealing with empty nest syndrome can include:

  • Stay connected with your children in new ways: Consider phone calls, video chats, or even shared hobbies to help maintain closeness while respecting their independence.
  • Rediscover your identity outside of parenting: Reflect on your interests, passions, and dreams that you may have set aside.
  • Prioritize your well-being: Focus on sleep, movement, and mindful routines to support your emotional health.
  • Lean on your support system: Share your feelings with friends, family, or other empty nesters.

According to the American Psychological Association, life transitions like empty nest syndrome can bring about feelings of grief, loss, and fear. Talking through them with supportive people, or with a licensed therapist, may help make the transition easier.

How to deal with feeling lonely

Loneliness can be one of the most challenging parts of becoming an empty nester. The silence at home may feel overwhelming at times. To help ease that feeling of isolation, consider:

  • Building a new routine: Whether it’s a daily walk, morning journaling practice, or volunteering at an organization you find meaningful, structure can help fill the void left by parenting routines.
  • Reconnecting with old friends: Some parents may find they now have more time to nurture adult friendships.
  • Exploring hobbies: Painting, gardening, traveling, learning new skills, or picking up another hobby can spark joy and give you a sense of purpose.
  • Spending time in community spaces: Joining a class, group, or club can offer new connections and reduce feelings of loneliness.

Staying connected with adult children

One concern that many empty nesters have is how their relationship with their adult children will change. While the day-to-day routines of parenting may fade, the bond you share with your child doesn’t have to weaken. It may simply shift into a new form. Ways to stay connected with adult children include:

  • Have regular check-ins: Whether it’s a weekly phone call, video chat, or even a group chat text thread, having a predictable touchpoint can bring comfort to both you and your child.
  • Share experiences: Watching the same TV show, reading the same book, or cooking the same recipe from afar can foster connection from a distance.
  • Recognize their achievements: Celebrating their milestones, big or small, shows that you are continuing to support them while honoring their adult life.
  • Plan visits with intention: When you do get time together in person, focus on quality time. Making memories together can help ease the heartache of time apart.

It can be tempting to reach out often, but giving your children the space to grow can help strengthen trust and build mutual respect. As roles shift, some parents may find that their bond with their children has become less about caretaking and more about shared respect, friendship, and love.

Ways to stay connected with adult children as empty nesters.

Tips for empty nesters

The transition to empty nesters can feel daunting, but it also holds opportunities for personal growth. Here are some tips to help you embrace this new chapter:

  • Celebrate milestones: Acknowledge both your child’s growth and your own journey through parenting.
  • Create shared traditions: Weekly check-ins or family dinners can keep bonds stronger.
  • Explore travel or experiences: Some empty nesters may find joy in exploring new places now that their schedules are more flexible.
  • Focus on relationships at home: This may be a great opportunity to deepen your connection with your partner, or even strengthen your relationship with yourself.
  • Keep learning: Taking a class, pursuing a degree, or learning something new can boost self-esteem, self-confidence, and engagement.

How to support a parent dealing with empty nest syndrome

Empty nest syndrome doesn’t only impact parents; it can shift dynamics within the whole family. If you’re an adult child noticing your parent is struggling with the transition, there are gentle ways you can offer support. Ways to support your parent include:

  • Check in with them: A quick call, text, or video chat can reassure your parent that you’re thinking of them. Small gestures of connection can ease feelings of loneliness.
  • Share details with them: Tell them about your experiences, ask for advice, or let them know how their support still matters to you. This can help reinforce their ongoing role in your life.
  • Encourage them to explore new opportunities: Suggest finding a new hobby, community activities, or travel ideas that align with their interests.
  • Plan meaningful visits: Whether it’s a weekend home or meeting somewhere new, intentional time together can help your parent feel valued and included.
  • Validate their feelings: Acknowledging their emotions without trying to “fix” them can be comforting.

Supporting a parent through empty nest syndrome is often about balance. This may mean giving them space to adjust while also showing them they’re still an important part of your life. These tips can help you support your parent so that they feel more connected, less alone, and more hopeful about this new chapter.

Therapy for empty nest syndrome

Sometimes, feelings tied to empty nest syndrome can feel more overwhelming than expected. Therapy can provide a safe space to talk through the emotions that can come with big life transitions. Working with a licensed therapist can help you:

  • Gain perspective on your shifting role as a parent
  • Navigate feelings of loss or loneliness
  • Explore ways to rebuild identity and purpose
  • Strengthen coping strategies for ongoing changes

Many people find that it is helpful to have mental health support during times of change. Exploring therapy options can be a meaningful step in caring for your mental health.

Takeaway

While becoming an empty nester may feel like a loss at first, it can also be an opportunity to grow, rediscover yourself, and embrace a new chapter. Feeling sadness or loneliness during this transition isn’t uncommon, and it may serve as a reminder of how much love and energy you’ve poured into raising your children.

As you adjust to your new routine, remember that your mental health matters, too. Whether through finding new hobbies, nurturing relationships, or seeking therapy, there are ways to navigate this season of life with compassion and resilience. If you’re ready to explore therapy options, you can browse hundreds of therapists at findmytherapist.com and schedule your first appointment directly online.