In 1988, October was declared Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. Both the month-long observance and Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day on October 15 were established to honor those who have experienced loss. They also strive to raise awareness about the emotional impact of miscarriage, stillbirth, and infant loss.
Pregnancy and infant loss can be a personal and isolating experience. Many people are unsure how to process their grief, care for themselves or others, or support others through loss. Understanding that mental health care can be an important part of healing may help families find a path forward.
What is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month?
Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month serves as a time to remember babies lost during pregnancy, at birth, or shortly after birth. It also serves as a time to acknowledge the families who grieve them. The pregnancy and infant loss awareness ribbon for this cause combines pink and blue, symbolizing remembrance and support.
Research suggests that open acknowledgment of grief can positively influence mental health outcomes, helping parents and families feel less alone in their experience. Awareness efforts also encourage conversations that reduce stigma and make it easier for people to seek emotional support.
The emotional impact of infant loss
Infant loss can bring a range of emotions that may shift and change over time. Some parents may experience guilt, emptiness, fear, or loneliness. Others may feel emotionally numb or a loss of trust in their own body. Grief can also impact appetite and sleep. Intensity and duration can vary for each person.
Some individuals may also experience symptoms of anxiety, depression, or trauma related to their loss. Support from a licensed mental health professional can help individuals process these emotions and begin to heal at their own pace.
Ways to cope with grief after loss
Grief after pregnancy or infant loss is deeply personal, and coping strategies may differ from person to person. Each person may experience emotions differently. Some may find comfort in one or more of the following approaches:
- Connecting with support groups or peer networks for those who have experienced miscarriage or infant loss.
- Sharing experiences with others.
- Practicing self-care through routines like journaling, mindfulness, or light movement such as walking or yoga.
- Creating traditions, rituals, or memorials to honor the baby, such as planting a tree, lighting a candle, or keeping a keepsake box.
- Seeking professional support, including therapy or grief counseling, to process emotions in a safe space.
- Using tools to develop grief coping skills, which may include guided reflections, structured journaling, or mindfulness exercises for grief and loss.
While grief can be a natural response to loss, some people may experience symptoms such as persistent sadness or difficulty functioning that may benefit from additional support from a licensed mental health professional.
Therapy for grief and loss
Professional mental health support can be a valuable resource for healing. Grief counseling or therapy can provide a safe, confidential environment to process emotions, explore coping strategies, and work through trauma or stress related to the loss. Therapists specializing in grief support may focus on:
- Building coping strategies for managing emotions.
- Processing trauma or distress related to the loss.
- Exploring the impact of loss on identity, relationships, and future plans.
Therapists who specialize in grief and loss can also help families navigate anniversaries and milestones with compassion. While therapy does not remove grief, it can provide tools and understanding to support emotional well-being over time.
Couples therapy for grieving parents
Each partner may experience and express grief differently. Differences in coping can sometimes create misunderstanding or emotional distance. Couples therapy can help by:
- Encouraging open communication about grief and emotional needs.
- Offering strategies to support one another while respecting individual healing.
- Developing shared ways to manage anniversaries, milestones, or triggers.
Some studies indicate that shared processing of grief within a supportive relationship can help reduce stress and strengthen connection over time.
When considering pregnancy after infant loss
For some, thoughts about future pregnancies can bring mixed emotions, including hope, fear, or stress. Some studies have shown that it’s common to experience increased stress or worry about future pregnancies after a loss, even when the medical risks are minimal. If you are considering another pregnancy, it may help to:
- Discuss emotional readiness with a licensed mental health professional.
- Connect with pregnancy loss support groups or communities for shared experiences and reassurance.
- Allow time to grieve fully before making decisions about another pregnancy.
Emotional readiness for a new pregnancy varies widely and may depend on medical and emotional recovery. These may be assessed collaboratively with a healthcare provider and a mental health professional.
Ways to support grieving parents
Emotional support for grieving parents can extend beyond words. Friends and family can help by:
- Offering to prepare meals or assist with household responsibilities.
- Checking in regularly.
- Encouraging them to seek connections through support groups or professional counseling.
- Sending thoughtful gestures such as a card, meal delivery, or care package.
A supportive, gentle presence can help parents feel less alone in their grief.
What to say when someone loses a baby
Supporting someone who has lost a baby can feel difficult. Many people worry about saying the “wrong” thing. Small, compassionate gestures can have a meaningful impact. Things to say that may be helpful include:
- “I’m here for you.”
- “I’m thinking of you during this difficult time.”
- “I can’t imagine what you’re going through.“
What to avoid:
- Phrases like “Everything happens for a reason,” which may feel invalidating.
Offering comfort can also mean practical help, such as preparing a meal, running an errand, or simply being present to listen.
Online resources for grief and loss
Connecting with others online can provide comfort and community. These resources offer educational materials, peer support, remembrance opportunities, and opportunities for mental health support:
- Share Pregnancy & Infant Loss Support: Offers peer-led support groups and educational materials for families coping with loss.
- March of Dimes: Provides information about pregnancy loss support, ways to honor babies who have passed, and community groups for grieving families.
- The Compassionate Friends: A national organization supporting families after the death of a child.
- Postpartum Support International (PSI): Offers mental health resources for parents, including support for those experiencing grief, postpartum depression, and perinatal mental health concerns.
- Find My Therapist: Browse therapists specializing in grief and loss. Choose your therapist at findmytherapist.com and schedule online.
Online resources and local counseling can complement each other, offering both connection and professional mental health support.
Takeaway
Pregnancy and infant loss can be life-changing and deeply painful. Recognizing this grief and seeking mental health support can help with healing over time. Awareness observances like Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month and Infant Loss Remembrance Day remind families that their loss is valid and deserving of acknowledgment.
If you’re coping with grief and loss, know that you are not alone. Support is available. You can explore therapy options and connect with a local, compassionate mental health professional at findmytherapist.com.